After their first meeting at Lucy’s house, Lucy found it much easier to reach out to Kayla, even if it meant she had to blatantly ignore her giant crush on her new friend. Instead of staring after Kayla in the hallway, Lucy called her name and waved. Kayla usually responded cheerily and waved back, which always left Lucy feeling giddy. Whenever Kayla stopped by her desk before astronomy class started and talked to her, Lucy practically floated from class to class for the rest of the day.
In the back of her mind, Lucy knew that her bond with Kayla was closely tied to the astronomy project. She found herself feeling an imminent sense of dread as the due date crept closer and closer, and was determined to make the most out of her limited time.
She made plenty of excuses about double-checking research and making sure that the report was as well-written as it could be just so she could spend more time with Kayla. They usually went to the library to work on their project together and giggled at the jokes they made in hushed voices. The librarian sometimes shot them angry looks, but that only caused them both to burst into another fit of controlled laughter.
Lucy and Kayla also went to the bleachers next to the track and brainstormed ideas to add to their report. Kayla would lie on the bleachers and stare up at the blue sky as she talked and gestured vividly with her hands to emphasize her points. Lucy sat next to her with a pen and notebook so she could quickly scribble down Kayla’s ideas. She always focused on the way Kayla’s lips formed familiar words and marveled at how the sun made Kayla glow with more radiance than usual. Lucy loved how Kayla’s poetic imagination perfectly complemented Lucy’s hidden creativity. Kayla just seemed to understand her in a way that even Lucy’s closest friends couldn’t if they tried.
Once, Kayla was rambling on the use of constellations as a motif in a story she read, which was totally off-topic. But Lucy loved watching her passionately talk about stars as if they were a philosophical problem that decades of philosophers had yet to solve, and responded, “You’re right about the whole ‘we romanticize constellations’ thing… but maybe the reason we find constellations so interesting and meaningful is that constellations are naturally pretty and mysterious. So it makes sense that we’re fascinated with them. Curiosity is one of the biggest parts of human nature, after all.”
Kayla snapped her fingers and sat up straight, looking Lucy in the eyes. “That’s exactly what I was about to say! Human nature! Wow, I think you might be my soulmate.”
Even though Kayla had jokingly mentioned soulmates before, the mere thought of Kayla truly meaning what she said was too intense for Lucy to bear. She could feel the tension crackling in the air around them as they stared into each other’s eyes, feeling a strange connection forming. Kayla’s eyes searched Lucy’s, and for a moment, Lucy was certain Kayla could tell she was falling head over heels for her.
Lucy was the first to break that tension by clearing her throat and saying, “I don’t know if you want to make that joke. The soulmate searchers are going to lose it when they hear you joked about soulmates.”
Kayla pressed her hands to her chest, doubled over laughing. “Yeah, the soulmate searchers take the whole soulmates thing too seriously. I don’t understand why you would devote your entire life to finding your soulmate when you could be happy with what you already have.”
Lucy wondered if Kayla knew even if she wasn’t Lucy’s soulmate, Lucy would be perfectly happy spending all the time in the world with Kayla. She had everything she needed right in front of her but, even then, she couldn’t have what she wanted most without betraying her parents.
Lucy’s parents had been noticing that she was spending a lot of time outside of school working on her astronomy project with Kayla. Asking her parents to go out with Kayla was much easier after the first time, and Lucy’s parents seemed to have the impression that Kayla was Lucy’s hard-working and friendly classmate, so they didn’t hesitate or try to prod at Lucy’s intentions when she asked to go out to the field to do the project with Kayla. But when Lucy started coming home in the evenings with a smile on her face instead of the grouchy frown she usually wore whenever she got home after a long day of school, her parents started questioning her.
Lucy’s brother had finished dinner quickly and ran off to his room one night, which meant Lucy was left at the dinner table with her grandparents and parents. She was trying her best to finish her meal so she could go back to her room and avoid talking to her parents, but her father decided to ask her about the project.
“Lucy, this project you’ve been doing, when will it be over? You seem to be spending a lot of time with Kayla,” asked Lucy’s father as he used his chopsticks to put some green beans into his bowl of rice. Lucy tensed up at the mention of Kayla but kept her cool so she wouldn’t raise suspicion.
“Oh, we’ll be done soon. It’s just the first project of the year so I really want to get a good grade so I can start strong.”
Lucy’s mother chimed in, her voice expressing her discontent with Lucy’s behavior. “I know, but you’ve been spending a lot of time with Kayla. I’ve never seen you spend that much time on a project. Shouldn’t you be studying for other classes too?”
“I am studying for other classes! I’m just working really hard on this project. Stop bothering me. I have this all under control, okay?”
Her mother slammed her chopsticks down on the table and shouted, “Don’t speak to me like that. You show me some respect! I work so hard to provide for you and your brother and you aren’t even willing to work hard in school? What kind of a daughter are you?”
Lucy wanted to scream back, but she pressed her lips together to hold back the words she wanted to say. From her past arguments with her parents, she learned that fighting back only worsened the situation. Her best option was to wait out her mother’s anger and rant about it to Ana later.
“Your entire future depends on how well you do this year. You do well this year and you can go to a good college, get a well-paying job, and live a good life. You better start taking this seriously. I only want what’s best for you.” Lucy’s mother’s voice faded as she concluded, signaling that the brief argument was finally at its end. Even though the argument would have seemed short to an outsider, Lucy felt like every word lasted five years, her mother’s words digging deep into her insecurities and fears.
“Okay, good talk. See you tomorrow morning.” Lucy stood up, grabbed her empty bowl, and put it in the kitchen before storming into her room. She tried not to let her parents’ words get to her, but they always made themselves at home in the back of her mind.
~
The days after Lucy’s parents blew up at her were always the worst. Lucy woke up the morning after feeling like she had been run over by a truck. She was so mentally, emotionally, and physically exhausted that she felt like she had used almost all her energy to get up. Even worse, that strange state she was in made her zone out for most of the morning, and she couldn’t think about Kayla without thinking about her mother’s rant.
Luckily, Lucy had Ana to talk to about her frustration with her parents. When the two met at school, Lucy explained the previous night’s ordeal to Ana and concluded her long ramble about her parents with, “It’s just really frustrating, and, you know, you’re the only person I can talk to about these things.”
“I can’t believe your mom lashed out at you again like that!” Ana exclaimed as she and Lucy walked down the hallway together to the cafeteria. Lucy drew her arms closer to her sides to avoid bumping into the students hurrying down the hall.
“It was a long time coming. Not a week goes by without my parents reminding me that my only purpose as their child is to be successful after everything they’ve risked for me. It makes me sound really selfish that I want to throw away everything just so I can do stuff I want, but I just feel like I shouldn’t have to do whatever my parents want me to do. Is that okay?” asked Lucy. She tried to keep her voice low since she hated complaining about her parents out in the open.
“That’s totally okay. You’re your own person. They shouldn’t have to plan your life,” Ana said, placing a comforting hand on Lucy’s arm. Ana’s hand dropped abruptly as she saw Kayla walking towards her and Lucy. “Oh! Your lover is coming over!”
“Don’t call her that,” Lucy hissed, before brightening up as Kayla approached her. “Hey, Kayla! What’s up?”
“Hey! I was wondering if you would want to meet up this Sunday so we can do the observation part of the project? Do you know any cool places around town where we can see the stars?” Kayla had a wide smile as she spoke and Lucy, despite frowning moments earlier, broke into a matching grin. Ana noticed and nudged Lucy, who elbowed her back as if to tell her to back off.
“Yeah! Just come over to my place and we can walk over to this field near my house. You can see the stars from the field, so it’s a great place for us to write observations.” Lucy blushed, already imagining how intimate the experience was going to be.
“Perfect! See you then.” Kayla made finger guns at Lucy before she disappeared into the sea of students traveling down the hallway. Lucy glanced after her longingly and sighed dreamily.
“You’re so gone for her,” Ana remarked, shaking her hand as she guided Lucy to the cafeteria.
love it!